Elon Musk
“Tesla autopilot will kill me well before the climate does.”
Ted Cruz
“Leaving my family on a burning planet while I escape to a vacation community on Mars will be one of the tougher decisions I’m definitely going to make.”
Vladimir Putin
“The best way to combat global warming is long nuclear winter.”
Lindsey Graham
“The thing climate alarmists won’t tell you is that light asphyxiation by a dominant female can be a really good time if you’re in the mood for it.”
Joel Osteen
“As good Christians the only thing we can do is get on our knees and pray to God that when the climate apocalypse comes liberals don’t find Jesus so we can keep the Kingdom of Heaven all for ourselves.”
Donald Trump
“I’ll have to rotate between my home cell in Georgia and my vacation cell in D.C. depending on what climate emergency is currently ravaging the country.”
Greg Abbott
“The best way to prepare for global warming is to give scientists the funds to invent terrifying new ways to murder climate refugees trying to cross the Rio Grande.”
Andrew Tate
“The body count for a woman should be less than 3 and Mother Earth is in the billions. She deserves whatever happens to her.”
Ben Shapiro
“Unless the sea-level rise is higher than 4’11” I don’t see how this is even remotely my problem.”
Vivek Ramaswamy
“My first order of business would be to balance the carbon tax on the top 1% of polluters with an oxygen tax on the bottom 99% of breathers.”
Clarence Thomas
“From my experience, the best way to alter any course of action is with an all-expense-paid trip to the Bahamas.”
